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This book is written by Emőke Bagdy, who is a Hungarian psychologist. I’ve actually listened to the audio book rather than read it. I usually don’t listen to audio books however this adds an extra layer of efficient communication and it was quite fun to listen to her while driving.

Goal of the book:

Have a clear understanding of stress, know how your mind and body functions and how to reduce / deal with stress.

So what is stress? Basically anything that you consider as stress. However as per definition stress is a reaction of your mind to some action where you can’t or don’t want to react in your preferred way. Simple example is that you don’t hit someone even when they said something rude.

Distress is the bad kind of stress, eustress is the good kind of stress. The good kind occurs when your work goals are aligned with your capacity and you set yourself to solve a problem. For a while you’ll feel stress, however soon you’ll think the situation though and you’ll see the steps to solve the problem. If you don’t see the steps, then you’ll know this thing will cause distress.

How to release stress:

Laugh

Jog

Relax

Touch

Help

Laugh

Laughing is the best medicine – Hungarian saying

If you’re meeting with your friends and laugh a lot you’ll already feel better. Actually we all know this. So don’t forget to meet your friends often and also surround yourself with people who you resonate with and with whom you can always have a good laugh. Experiments also show that people with medical conditions who watch 30 minutes – 1 hour comedy each day will feel a lot better afterwards and they conditions will be better. Did I mention that our body and mind is so connected that when you force yourself to smile you’ll immediately will feel better? It’s all wired in our body. This is also the reason why you should watch your position and should practice power poses before a stressful situation like a job interview.

Jog / Training

Healthy soul in healthy body – Hungarian saying

Your body and mind is highly connected. If your body is healthy and you train at least 3-4 times a week, you have a high change that your mind will be healthy too. I feel this myself. Once I stop training for 1-2 weeks, I’ll have a lot less energy and will be frustrated a lot easier.

Tip: Don’t over train. If you did a hard training, do something light the next day, or skip physical training completely. You could still do technical training in some sport ie. mountain biking or just train your mind.

Relax

Relax with your friends and family, go out in the nature, even just for a short walk. People who walk 30 minutes a day are a lot happier (and healthier). This can be taken as jogging too, if you’re unable or don’t want to do more training. However just go out, have a nice swim at the nearest (outdoor) pool, do that long awaited meeting with your friends. It’s a good idea to leave home and have a different environment, do this often.

Tip: join meetups if you’re unsure where to go, or if you would experiment and meet new people or would explore new hobbies.

Touch

Touching helps you release some stress, so buy a nice aromatic massage gel and enjoy time with your partner. Don’t forget to hug or kiss her or him at any time of the day. It will not just make your partner happy, however it will make you more healthy. This should be an integral part of our lives. Experiments show that a child who is hugged and touched by the parents and family members often will have a lot better and more balanced (emotional) adult life.

Help

Finding meaning is life can be challenging, however people who are helping and giving to others are happier and have less stress in their life. So next time you see someone carrying a heavy bag, help them. If you see someone in need, give them some food or anything, no matter how small, you will make a difference in their life and in yours too. Did you consider that if you support someone from a poor country  with 10 USD, this worth 5-10 times more in that poor country? So you made a difference of 50-100 dollars with just 10. A small donation for you can be a huge help for them.